Mystical Experiencer: Female in late sixties
Submission date: December 17, 2021
Current location: U.S.A.
Age at time of experience: 28
I was practicing meditation I learned from a book and teaching the method. I think I used the word “one” for my mantra. I was so worried about how I would support my young son and at the same time go to a training school in a different city. There was a daily allowance that barely covered the babysitting fees I would encounter vs. the nightly stay cost (it was a two-week training course).
So, while I was saying my nightly prayers at about 11:00 pm, I decided to meditate because I was having a hard time quieting my anxiety. I suddenly slipped into a white light, and my mind was pulsing, like in ecstasy or a euphoric feeling. I likened it to an orgasm in my head, but it went on and on and on.
I didn’t see anyone but I felt a deep, intense love. I was somehow aware it was God. That he loved me.
I remember saying I have to go back – my son needs me. I opened my eyes, but the room I was in was illuminated. The time was in the middle of the night, but when I looked out the window, the dark was illuminated also. I don’t remember sleeping at all, but I awoke in the morning.
I ran upstairs where my mother was just making breakfast. I told her of my experience, and she said there was no such thing, that I was just dreaming. I told her “NO”, there is a God and he is everywhere and it is all LOVE. She brushed me off (she was a strict Catholic and nothing in her upbringing told her to listen to me or believe me).
Years later, before her death, she wanted me to tell her more. I didn’t think she even remembered, but she did. She saw me differently, knowing sometimes I was closer to things in the afterlife – more than she understood.