Mystical Experiencer: Male in early thirties
Current location: U.S.A.
Age at time of experience: 21
I had dropped out of college previously due to a lack of motivation to continue my studies and experiencing a lack of pleasure in things I used to enjoy. A couple of nights previously, I remembered my depression was so severe that I did not recall leaving my bedside for long periods of time for over two to three days.
Then the next evening, I felt a pull to go outside and take a walk around the neighborhood. During my walk I felt calm and found myself walking into the Island cemetery where there was a tree in the middle of the plot of land that “called” to me to come sit under it. When I sat under the tree, I crossed my legs and closed my eye as I was taught by my therapist at the time and from what I had read from textbooks on Buddhism.
I have no knowledge how long it was. However, I felt the tree against my back become one with me and pulled me into a deep void where I felt I stay for an eternity. Then from “deep” within this void I felt a spark of what I struggle to categorize as golden light and love erupt through my being filling me with compassion and love. At its climax I saw visions of my life flash before me of my compassionate acts towards others ending with a focus on myself from the third person and a calm voice spoke “You are love”.
From there I opened my eye and felt the full moon greet me and comfort me. My take-away from this experience is to not forget that I made an impact on peoples’ lives, even when I don’t notice it, and that the one that matters most is the one that stares back at me in the mirror.