Mystical Experiencer: Male in mid-sixties
Current location: U.S.A.
Age at time of experience: 30
While listening to music, I became the music, which took me what seemed like out of my body, through the star field, and eventually into the Void of complete and eternal darkness. After being transported beyond the barrier of the container in which I had been diffused or decayed like the music, I remained for an eternal length of time suspended in eternal darkness and silence.
I knew I was in the place both where you are after you die and where you are before you are born. Both of these realizations were without emotion and purely observations. After being “shown” many paradoxes, from both their opposing sides, and being suspended in eternity, like being inside a black velvet lining of a womb like infinite vastness, I realized “I was nothing”.
Upon this realization, in response, I then lost any sense of I or self and became one with that which is aware of everything in the universe at the same time. Not from one thing to the next but everything simultaneously. I vacillated between feeling “I” was nothing and being at one with the pure awareness that is aware of everything in the universe for all eternity, simultaneously.
Eventually I remained in the position of being nothing, again suspended in eternal darkness and silence. After some time in this eternal darkness I understood a directive or instruction or suggestion to turn around and look back. Despite not having a body I had a sense of the direction that I had come in and somehow turned my focus, gazing into the darkness only in one direction, in the direction I felt I had come from.
I gazed in this direction for some time, seeing only infinite darkness, and then thought I saw the faintest glimmer of light eons away. I tried to penetrate deeper with my “sight” even though I had no physical eyes really, and after a while again saw a glimmer of light. This time I focused on the faint speck and felt an attraction to it. As soon as this desire arose I began to be drawn toward the light at a tremendous rate of increasing acceleration as I had experienced before when going through the star field. As I got closer, I began to slow and eventually stopped. I was now hovering over an enormous luminous orange sphere. It seemed to be as large as a planet. I wanted to descend down into it and slowly started to do so by the draw of this desire.
After a short time of slowly descending, a voice a bit behind me and to my right suddenly said in panic “My self, my self, what about my self? I am losing my self!?” With the hearing of this panicked concerned voice, my descent was halted and I was immediately retracted back through the path I had taken to get there, wherever that was.
At a similar ever increasing acceleration rate, I traveled back through the darkness, through the place where I had turned around, through the barrier, through the star field and slammed back into the chest of my body lying on the floor. It was known immediately to me that I had just experienced real reality, normal reality. Everything else up to that experience was not real reality.